I recently lost my phone and returned to using my laptop.
Frances: What are you doing?
Me: I’m just trying to restore some functionality to my digital world…
Frances: It’s been an hour!!!
#asd #autism #aspergers
I was explaining to 12yo Frances that, even though I’d once been in a cycling accident, I hadn’t ended up in hospital with broken bones.
She said, “See? You’re decently smart.”
Ok, but I…It’s just…I don’t know why she thought that might be an issue for me? 🤷♀️ 😂
~Student. I’m 12
~Anything that makes me enough money to run a Friesian and Lippizaner care centre attached to a vet’s office where my friends can come and ride my horses for free. Not Mummy
~Mint chocolate chip
~Black, lime green, white, and gold
~My birthday, duh
~Yes, whatever doesn’t burn the house down
~I’ve been shown how to drive a tractor
~Yes, of course!
~Yes, I think that’s kind of obvious
~Black Raybans. (Can I wear Gucci?)
~Chanel No. 5
~Smile by R. Telgemeier
~English and Western horseback riding
~Pink Cup Cat, Pink Cup Dog, Pink Cup Pony
~East Side Mario’s
#asd #aspergers #autism
Just in case you’re wondering what the Pink Cup Family does on a Saturday afternoon (after returning from the barn), I provide you the following glimpse.
Apparently, we just laze about in the living room discussing things that have little or no relevance to what any of us is actually doing, and Frances’s wit simply thrives in that kind of environment.
For example, though I don’t know how we arrived at this topic, there was this exchange between Pink Cup Sister (16) and myself.
Me: Many people who deal drugs don’t actually do drugs themselves…They’re in it to make money; they know if they get hooked, they won’t make money.
Pink Cup Sister: Are you saying drug dealers are smart?!
Frances: We’re saying they’re a •cut• above. (She is smiling, looking down at her iPad, probably waiting for us to catch up.)
This made me laugh aloud, but how would she know anything about the language of recreational drug use or the hierarchical structure of that kind of activity? She’s twelve! (Well, she does watch reality police and medical shows at night before bedtime.)
I do, oftentimes, catch Frances covering her mouth while silently giggling and walking away; it’s usually because she has detected something that a kid her age wouldn’t normally catch.
It’s a new behaviour this year, and I’m loving it.
I’m not saying that Frances doesn’t have her moments, but this kid is just all kinds of wonderful.
#asd #aspergers #autism
Every summer, we have the opportunity to have a support worker, through a local non-profit organization, take Frances out into the community for fun activities and maybe to socialize.
It is, of course, considered respite for the family, and we’ve never told Frances. I really do think of it as a great opportunity for her to do the things for which I seem to lack energy these days.
At any rate, Frances met her worker, Aida, today. All week, my 12-year-old daughter has been referring to her as “the woman you pay to take me off your hands for a few hours every week.” 🤦♀️
I’ve actually had to ask her to stop saying that in public! She is expressing her dry sense of humour by highlighting what she thinks is the bottom line that nobody talks about.
And all morning, I kept my fingers crossed that Frances wouldn’t say that to Aida during their outing.
(Mental note: Ask Frances not to say that to Aida.)
Since she was three years old, Frances has had an intense interest in all things medical 🏥. It shows up everywhere, especially at 11 years old.
The other day during March break, Frances announced, as she typically does (literally) in passing, what was on her mind:
“Mum, if someone were saying, ‘I can’t feel my face when I’m with you’ to me, I would say, ‘Stroke! You’re having a STROKE!’” 😂
Yes, one of the benefits of having a child who focusses so intensely on her subjects of interest is that you are fortunate enough to suddenly find yourself in the most entertaining (as well as enlightening) of conversations.
Recently, I was discussing with someone an event that had occurred while I was hospitalised last autumn and described the cautiousness that my care team had demonstrated regarding some cardiovascular and cardiopulmonary symptoms. Frances couldn’t help herself, she interrupted because she just had to know:
Did they give you TPA?
Did you hear, “Code Blue” over the loudspeaker?
Did anyone say, “Everyone to the resuscitation bay!”
She speaks now of becoming a surgeon which, I’ve told her, would probably allow her to continue her equestrian ambitions.
This past weekend at Grandma’s birthday party, Grandma and her sons were trying to find a vase for the flowers we’d bought her.
Frances, focussing on her iPad, muttered, “God, don’t these people have a sense of depth?”
I leaned over and said, “What do you mean?”
“I mean, can they not look at the flowers and look at a vase and predict with some accuracy that the flowers will fit or will not fit the vase?”
😂 Sometimes, I wonder how it is that I don’t choke because she says the funniest things when I happen to be eating.
Let me be clear: Frances is not being mean; she’s being honest — at a time when most people wouldn’t be — without a stitch of malice.
Hands down, it was the best comment of the evening — and, even though she definitely has to learn not to express these thoughts, her cleverness made me proud.
Yes, I do have to teach her that saying these things aloud isn’t okay, but convincing her lately has become so very difficult.
I have to do it for each instance, too, because she usually wouldn’t generalise.
“We have to keep that as an ‘inside thought’,” I usually say.
“Why? Why can’t I say this?”
“Because it hurts people’s feelings.”
“That’s silly. It’s just an observation…”
And so it goes. Lots of conversation about why we’re having the conversation. So, dear readers, this area of things doesn’t necessarily get easier, but it does become funnier! (At least in our case.)
Me: How was your day?
Me: Oh…that’s too bad. Now, you can ask me how my day was.
Frances: I’d rather not
It’s a good thing that I was leaving the room at the time because this exchange made me giggle. Frances is all kinds of amazing!
As she grows, I believe that she will find friends who appreciate her honesty as much as we do.